Sea Star
by X-Lynn McTavels
Summary: Snape is having dreams of the past. The thing is the only pleasant one he has is the only one he can't remember. All he knows of it is that he is searching to find something out, but he doesn't know what it is he wants to know.
1. Sea Star

Disclaimer: Nothing from any of the Harry Potter books is owned by myself. All writings are fictional and have nothing to do with anything that is going to happen in the books, movies and or anything else.  
  
Story Title: Sea Star *Until I figure out a different title*  
  
Rating: PG 13  
  
Summary: Snape is having dreams of the past. The thing is the only pleasant one he has is the only one he can't remember. All he knows of it is that he is searching to find something out, but he doesn't know what it is he wants to know. The only other dreams he has are nightmares of his parents treatment to him, the harsh words and even hasher beatings. But between all this dreaming there is a new student that is sorted into his house and he could swear he's met her before.  
  
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Chapter One: ~*Sea Star*~  
  
A young man of sixteen shed off his robes and waited into the icy cold water of the ocean. When he was waist deep he stood there with his eyes closed enjoying the serenity that was only found at the sea side. This was the one place he could be at peace, the one place he could sit and think alone with out worrying that Black or Potter would pull some prank on him. Every school day since they were eleven they had thought of every trick in the book to pull on him. This year they had gone to far and tried to kill him. But even that thought didn't brother him when he was here. After a few more moments of soaking in the relaxing feeling of the lapping water against his bare skin, he dived into the water and began to swim. He held his breath and dove to the bottom opening his eyes he could only see a few inches in front of him because of the stinging salt. But he saw enough to find a shell he picked it up and went back to the surface of the water, once there he swam over to some rocks and sat upon them. He loved to just sit there and think for long periods of time, letting the sun pinken his fair skin and the water splash up on his feet as they hung over the edge. He opened his hand to see the shell he held in his palm. It was a white spiny one,  
  
"I know what you are." He stated to it, "You're a Venus Comb Murex but you are found in the Philippines. How long did it take you to drift here?" He asked as if by doing so the shell would tell him of all its journeys at the sea's depths. He studied it a good long time and after making sure nothing was living in it he decided to take it home to add to his collection. But later, right now he only wanted to watch the sun set, sure it would be cold by the time he swam back to the shore to retrieve his clothes but it was worth it. He watched the sky turn a deep red,  
  
"Red sky at night sailor's delight." He recited to himself. That meant tomorrow would be fair weather or so the saying told. He sighed knowing he must return home soon, how he wished to stay out here longer. But the chill of the night air had already set in. So he climbed out more to the edge of the rocks and sat a bit longer thinking. As he did so the water next to him rippled as if something big was swimming just below the surface. He stared at the spot and now the ripples were closer. As he tried to figure out what it was a girl that of his own age came out of the water and before he could even think on asking who she was she threw her arms about his neck and kissed him. The young lad too surprised to fight her off gave into the kiss. After the kiss ended the girl slid back into the water and started to shore.  
  
"Huh...Wait!" The boy called after her and dove into the water himself but she was a much faster swimmer then he and so she reached the shore before he could. When he reached the shore himself she had already walked halfway across. He hurried to stand up and get out of the water, but when she stopped and turned to face him he truly saw her now. She had sleek white skin as pale as moon light, red hair that looked to be made up of fire and gold, and eyes icy blue, eyes only to be found in the Arctic glaciers. He stood entranced by her it was now he remembered he was bare, but she herself was only warped in a fish net that didn't do to much to cover her. She smiled at him as the breeze kicked up around them. And he heard her speak the words,  
  
"My name Star." When she spoke it sounded as though the ocean's water had taken life and spoke those words in rhythm of a song. With that she turned and left walking like she were made of the water she sounded to be. He stood there dumbfounded with the whole ordeal he wanted to fallow but couldn't since his mother was calling him in. He sighed and got on his robes swearing to himself that he would find out who she was. 


	2. Only dreaming

My Name: X-Lynn McTavels  
  
Story Title: Sea Star *Until I figure out a different title*  
  
Rating: PG 13  
  
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Chapter Two:  
~*Only dreaming*~  
  
Snape woke up with the memory smell of the sea side filling his nostrils. He kept his eyes closed not to lose it once he saw that he was truly in his room at Hogwarts with his dark green curtains that surrounded him in darkness.  
  
"Ah that dream again." He said to himself, yes he had woken up several times with having had the same dream. But what was the dream about he could never remember only the feeling that he had been at the sea side. Unlike his other dreams this one left him to awaken with the sense of being completely rested and at ease with his mind. But the wanting to know something was tugging at his heart. His other dreams were actually that of a nightmarish nature, if he didn't wake up in a cold sweat, it was suppressing a scream. Those he was quite use to by now but this dream leaving him clam and actually not his miserable self disturbed him more then the nightmares of gory detail. For he knew what those were of, oh he knew to well what those were. But this, his only happy dream, that made him yearn for it left him more frightened the others for he didn't know why or what it was. He sat up reluctant to shake off the feeling, but knew it wasn't healthy to hang on to it.  
  
"It was merely a dream...That's all..." The man sighed and went over to the bathroom mirror. He looked into it upon his stress ridden face that was so ready to frown and sneer he knew even more that it was a dream and only that.  
  
"It must be about the beach house." He murmured to his reflection turning on the cold water and splashing his face. "That was the only place I could let my guard down, if only for a moment." He took the green hand towel and dried his face. With that he went back into his bed room and over to his closet going about picking out his robes for the day. Black like most other things in his closet and draws. He owned one pare of green robes and one only, this was due to it being his favorite and house color. His night shirts were gray that was just a lighter black. His under shirts where white but the were always under his black ones, his socks were black save one pare and that was for laundry day. He slipped off his gray night shirt and folding it neatly set it in the dirty clothes hamper, then went on to the task of buttoning his shirt up so that he pressed the dream to the furthest depths of his mind. There it would stay until it could fight it's way past the dark thoughts, fear and paranoia to the little light and senses of plusher he had left after his long life of torture and torturing. 


	3. Breakfast

My Name: X-Lynn McTavels  
  
Story Title: Sea Star *Until I figure out a different title*  
  
Rating: PG 13  
  
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Chapter Three: ~* Breakfast*~  
  
Snape walked to the Great Hall for the morning meal. He hated breakfast, but went to keep Dumbledore off his back about his not eating. He didn't like eating in front of every one, he felt like he was on display or perhaps an animal at the zoo. Yes that was it, one of the animals in a cage, that the little kids goggled at as the care takers gave them their food.  
  
"Well what animal am I that they dare to stare so much?" He thought to himself as he walked, more stormed, into the Great Hall were their sat no students for tonight they would arrive by the throngs. Today was his last day of peace from their staring at him. He reached the staff table were the other teachers sat reading the morning paper and chatting. He glared the sight, hopefully they wouldn't try to talk to him today.  
  
"Well good morning Severus you slept late today." He cringed as his hopes we shattered. He sat down smoothly in his chair and replied,  
  
"Yes Head Master." He poured himself some juice and tried to make it obvious he wanted to be left alone. But that didn't stop him oh no the Head Master seemed to think that Snape needed to open up and be more friendly.  
  
"Then I take it you slept well." Snape set his cup down, he truly respected the Head Master and was grateful to him for he was the only reason he wasn't in prison at this very moment. But why didn't he understand that he didn't like idle chit chat? Especially in the mornings,  
  
"For once yes I did..." His words faded, thinking of the mysterious dream again. Dumbledore looked over at him with a small smile.  
  
"Pleasant dreams I hope." This shook Snape out of his thoughts and his defensiveness took over.  
  
"I wouldn't know, I don't remember my dreams. Also I don't care to try to." Professor Trelawney looked over at him in a hazy voice commented,  
  
"For you must fear knowing what they are trying to tell you." Snape glared at her that was the last straw. He stood taking two pieces of toast and his goblet from the table.  
  
"If you'll excuse me, I'll take my food in my office. Talk of utter nonsense about my dreams trying to tell me things is keeping me from important things that are in reality. Not a la la dream land." With that he turned his back on them all and walked out. Trelawney sat there mouth hanging open then left herself.  
  
Snape went into his office with the right mind to scream in frustration, but he did no such thing as he slumped into the chair behind his desk and took a rater angry bite out of his toast.  
  
"Damn women, she's more batty then...My talking to myself once again." He said aloud then silenced himself. It wasn't safe to talk aloud out side of his room. Peeves or some one worse might hear. So he went on chewing his toast in brewing quite. 


	4. Half to death

My Name: X-Lynn McTavels  
  
Story Title: Sea Star *Until I figure out a different title*  
  
Rating: PG 13  
  
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Chapter Four:  
~*Half to Death*~  
  
The boy slipped into his clothes and started home with his shoes tied together and hung over his shoulder. He walked quickly knowing he'd be in trouble for being so late. But that girl, his thoughts were interrupted by the yelling of his father. He cringed seeing what lay ahead in his mind's eye. His mother cowering from him with her face berried in her arms. Her weeping barely heard over her husband's rage. Was this caused by his being late to return home? His question was answered as he got closer and could understand what was being said. There were no mentions of his name or his father saying, "That boy of yours..." No it wasn't about his being late, it was about something he didn't even care to try and hear as to what it was. All he wanted to do was sneak in with out being noticed, so his father's anger wouldn't be turned on him. He didn't try to help his mother for she never tried to help him, and sooner or latter she'd take what ever he did to her out on him. At lest by not helping he knew he deserved the ear boxing that was coming to him.  
  
When he was younger he had cried when his father yelled at his mother and struck her, but that only got him a smack on the jaw to get him to stop it. Later his mother would yell at him for making his father angry and twist his ear while pushing him into the closet. Screaming,  
  
"Get in there you brat! You're on time out until I say so!" He'd cry out to his mother's forgiveness for whatever he had done. But she never listened only replied,  
  
"Everything was fine before you came along." When he was little he didn't understand what she had meant by these words. When he had gotten about seven he understood them and they hurt much more then the buries left behind by his parents blows. But when he was about nine he realized that he hadn't made them conceive him. It was their own fault for not using protection. Since that day he didn't cry at his mothers words any more, only grew more and more hateful towards his parents at each saying. He use to fear both his mother and father. But now he knew he was stronger then his mother and the stupid women had done all of this to herself. But he still feared his father each beating got worse, last one he had received he had to go to the hospital. Naturally his parents said he had a run in with a rogue blugger while practicing his Quittigh. So naturally everyone believed them for it was normal for wizard boys to get hurt doing such things.  
  
Tonight he wasn't going to get caught up in it; he didn't want the feelings that might be happiness from this mystery girl to go away. He wanted to be able to have time and bore the memory of tonight into his mind, before his father beat him senseless once again and he'd forget her forever. That way he could remember one happy thing, one person that had shown him at lest a little shred of love. So he could dream of her no matter how bad things got. He wanted a shred of hope to light his way through his mind of darkness.  
  
With these thoughts he went to the back of the house and slowly opened the back door. Being careful not to let it creak as he stepped into the kitchen it was dark and quite, save the light underneath the door leading to the hall way and the raving of his father and crying of his mother. His stomach growled making him jump; he hadn't realized how hungry he was. He stopped making sure his father's foot steps weren't coming to the room he was in. They were standing still for the moment; did he dare chance getting something to eat? His gut let out another rumble; he looked longingly at the pantry. No, getting food was too risky he had already chanced his luck to many times tonight. He made sure once more that his father was to busy to hear him, then walked up and leaned against the door to the hall way and opened it a crack. The beast of a man standing over the woman had his back to him and was blocking the horrid woman's view. It was now or never, he opened the door enough to let himself through. After the door was closed once more he went into a full sprint to his room. But he took one moment to long and his father turned and spotted him almost around the corner that would have saved him from what came next.  
  
"And why are you home so late?" The boy stopped dead in his tracks knowing there was no stopping the inevitable. He turned with his head down, his hair hiding his face and eyes from view. He acted as a Bata wolf that was being treated by an Alfa. He didn't look him in the eyes and let his neck show. He spoke in a quite and monotone voice,  
  
"I lost track of time sir..." His answer wasn't good enough. His father leered at him,  
  
"You seem to be doing that a lot lately. Is it that you don't know how to tell time?" The boy shook his head.  
  
"Or is it that some thing is so important you have to worry your mother sick as to where you are, because you didn't check in?" The boy sucked in his cheeks in anger. His mother wasn't worried about him. He could see out of the corner of his eye that she was smirking about him getting the heat now and not her. His father was never a patient man as he stepped closer to the boy he asked in a dangerously low voice,  
  
"Well is there?" The boy wanted to say yes. That girl was much more important then his stupid bitch of a mother that didn't even care about him. But he answered,  
  
"No sir..." His fists balling up at his sides. His father now was looming over him, half his face masked in shadows, the other smirking evilly at him.  
  
"Why were you out so late then?" He asked his son stepping to where he was only inches away from him.  
  
"I was swimming and..." He had to stop himself, he almost told about her. He couldn't let this man take her away, he would too, he had taken everything else from him.  
  
"And what?" The boy had to hold himself from shutting as his father starched his ear, it looked all too close to him about to back hand him across the cheek.  
  
"And I lost track of time that's all." The man narrowed his eyes, now his wife chimed in.  
  
"I think the little brat is lying..." The man snapped his glare over at her,  
  
"No one asked you!" She shut up with a glare as he turned to look at his son again. They had the same nose, the same eyes and hair. They were now also the same height after the son's growth spurt; it seemed as if almost looking into a mirror. But one was unmistakably older then the other. The father sneered,  
  
"But I think you're right for once...Now boy what were you doing?" The boy stared at the man's shoe determined not to tell. His mind raced how he could be so dumb as to let it slip that he had something else besides swimming going on.  
  
"I was only swim..." But he was cut off but his father's hand rising to hit him, it was as if in slow motion he watched the hand sweep towards his face. The ring that would soon cut his fair skin glinting in the low flames of the burning candles. He squeezed his eyes shut to try and not see this.  
  
Snape awoke with a start that nearly landed him on the floor. He was now once again his adult self in his office at Hogwarts. He was gripping the chair so hard his knuckles were white. He was drenched in a cold sweat and his heart pounding as fast as a jack rabbit's. He sat there blinking for a whole five minutes before he convinced himself he was safe and not about to be beaten half to death by his father yet again. No that would never happen again he was a grown man now, he was safe from that bastard. He loosened his grip on his chair and took in slow deep breaths in attempts to calm himself. There was a knock at his door that made his heart leap into his mouth. He swallowed and asked in a horse whisper,  
  
"Who-who's..." He stopped relieved his voice had been inaudible, the stammering wasn't excitable. He cleared his through,  
  
"Who is there?" He asked trying disparately to sound normal and keep his voice from shaking.  
  
"McGonagall, Albus wanted me to fetch you for the feast." Snape looked over at his clock had he truly slept that long? He was quite for a second before he stood and straightened his robes. He walked over to the door and opened it.  
  
"Yes, well let's get this over with." He said with a sneer. McGonagall looked at him worry fled to her face,  
  
"Are you all right Severus you look a fright?" Snape waved his hand to shoe her along,  
  
"Fine, fine...I messed up on a potion as all." With that he walked on before she could call him on it being a lie. 


	5. Feast of the Forgotten

My Name: X-Lynn McTavels  
  
Story Title: Sea Star *Until I figure out a different title*  
  
Rating: PG 13  
  
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Chapter Five:  
~*Feast of the Forgotten*~  
  
Snape walked ahead of McGonagall so she wouldn't be able to talk to him. He didn't like lying to her but he felt ashamed that he was still afraid of his father after all these years. He hated that he still woke up from nightmares about him and that he flinched at times when some one's movements because they reminded him of his father's. He was a grown man for Merlin's sake! He hadn't seen his father since he was seventeen and had moved out.  
  
When they reached the Great Hall he refrained from looking about, he could feel their eyes on him. The glares of loathing and daggers, that didn't bother him he didn't like any of them either. He went over and sat in his chair and waited for McGonagall to bring in the new first years. It seems he had missed Dumbledore's start of the year announcements. But he knew what they were so that didn't matter much. What mattered was now Potter and his two friends would be wondering why he had to be retrieved for dinner. Now they'd be snooping about to find out. More chances to give them detentions and take off points. McGonagall now came in with a string of first years behind her all trembling in fear. He smirked and despite himself yawned, he had slept more then he had in a long time and was now drossy from it. Also the Sorting Hat's singing didn't much help the fact and he had to fight to stay awake.  
  
As McGonagall read off the names his attention drifted in and out of the students and what house they were sorted into. She was into the M's and only three Slithering, he yawned again covering his mouth with the back of his hand. McGonagall now called out an 'N' name,  
  
"Nesia, Amie." He looked up at this name it certainly wasn't one he had heard before. But this girl wasn't a first year, she was easily a fifth or sixth. He couldn't help but watch as the hat thought over what house she'd be in; it seemed he was having trouble doing so. He was sure he had never seen the girl in his life, but she seemed so familiar. The girl look more freighted then any of the other students as she sat so still on the stool as if wanting to disappear. It was as if he were looking at some one he once knew long ago. The girl had sleek white skin as pale as moon light, red hair that looked to be made up of fire and gold, and eyes icy blue, eyes only to be found in the Arctic glaciers. Who was she? One of the Death Eater's daughters perhaps? That must be it...Yet again no, because none of them had the last name Nesia. Of course he didn't know all of them but he knew that wasn't of the names. His thoughts were cut short by the hat calling out,  
  
"SLYTHERIN!" He clapped with the rest of the staff and his table of students. He didn't even pay attention to the rest of the names only stole glances over at the girl. She was sitting at the end of the table trying hard not to be noticed by any one. She had her head bowed and legs curled up in front of her, feet resting on the edge of her seat. The feeling of her being a familiar stranger grew stronger the longer he looked at her. She must have felt him staring at her, for she looked up at the staff table with a lost expression. He looked away just in time for her not to know it was him looking at her. He felt her eyes wonder over him for a moment or two then go back to staring at the table.  
  
Finally the last name was called and the food appeared too much delight of the students. All save Miss Nesia. She looked at the food as if it might be poison; she only reached for the pitcher of water and poured herself some. So while all her piers were chatting and getting to know the new students she only drank her water. In fact she drank enough water in such a short time she had to get another pitcher for she emptied the first one dry. He watched in wonder as she gulped the water as if she hadn't time for anything else, even breathing. Soon enough she finished that pitcher and went to another. So it went for the rest of the feast. Snape tore his eyes away from the girl and looked over to McGonagall,  
  
"Who is she?" He asked, and McGonagall didn't have to inquire on to who he meant. She had seen him watching her. "She can't be a first year." He observed. The woman nodded watching the girl drink another countless glass of water.  
  
"You're right she isn't. She is actually a mystery to all of us." McGonagall Looked back at Snape, "Do you know her?" Snape shook his head, but didn't go on to explain that he felt like he did.  
  
"No, but she is a bit odd...Do you think she's all right? I mean she won't choke drinking her water so fast?" She shrugged,  
  
"She hasn't yet...Hagrid was the one to first meet her after her name appeared on the list of first years. He said she had been drinking water like that since she woke up from her comma." Snape looked at her confused, "Oh sorry I forgot you don't know. Her name appeared on the list at the last minute as I was checking it to make sure I hadn't missed any one. When the quill stopped writing the new borns' names and went backup the list and started to write 'Nesia, Amie'. I was so confused because it said she was to be in her fifth year and was at a muggle hospital by the sea side. I talked it over with Albus and he said we could at lest check it out. So Hagrid was sent to get her." She paused and sighed. "She was there as was written, but the oddest thing is, she doesn't know who she is, why she was at the hospital or who her family might be." Snape looked back over at the girl still drinking water then back at McGonagall.  
  
"Well how is she had come to the hospital and her name..." McGonagall nodded,  
  
"Well she was found by some fisher men washed up on the rocks of a beach. She was unconscious and beat up pretty badly from being smashed up against the rocks by the waves." Snape looked over at the girl again, he hadn't noticed it before but she did have quite a few bruise on her, a large one on her cheek and a few on her arms that were reviled as her selves slipped up to her elbows.  
  
"Her name she made up herself." McGonagall explained. Snape said the name to himself.  
  
"Amie Nesia...." He whispered, "Amnesia...Cleaver." McGonagall nodded,  
  
"Very, so it is that we gave Hagrid fake papers that he was her adopted father, of course we gave the dear girl an expiation before so she had a choice to come or not. She went along with it and now here she is. She's scared half to death though." Snape nodded and survived the girl once more.  
  
"I can tell..." He felt a tinge of pity and sorrow for the girl. Not to know who you are was something he couldn't even image. The feast ended and he watched as she finished another glass of water and then fallowed Malfoy to the common room.  
  
"Are you searching for her parents?" McGonagall stood looking down at him,  
  
"Yes but no luck, not even a repot of any missing girls in the area she was found in..." Snape talked to her for a few more moments. Then stood and left to his chambers with the feeling of wanting to know more about this girl over whelming him to no end. As he entered his bed room he stood at the foot of his bed. He sighed and slipped off his robes swearing to himself that he would find out who she was. 


	6. What Dreams May Come

My Name: X-Lynn McTavels  
  
Story Title: Sea Star *Until I figure out a different title*  
  
Rating: PG 13  
  
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Chapter Six:  
~*What Dreams May Come*~  
  
Snape sat up most of the night reading, half too curious of whom the girl was and why she seemed familiar and half too fearsome of what dreams may come. So he poured over his books of sea legends and then his potions and then back again. But as he was only a man sleep soon took hold of him, making his hand loosen its grip on the book and letting it fall to the ground.  
  
As he slept his mind was hunted by a song he had heard with out knowing it many times over when he was younger. It sounded only as an ocean breeze and the waves lapping at the shore but he had listened closer while drifting off to sleep. A girl's voice calling to him with the words,  
  
Sailor come to me  
Answer my call, here my plea  
  
Sailor come to me  
Fill thy heart with love for me  
  
Sailor come to me  
Hear my song for entirety  
  
Sailor come to me  
In the depths of the sea  
  
Sailor come to me  
  
This hadn't been the only song she had sung to him, but it was the one she sung most often. Of course he didn't know it was her. Or truly that he had been hearing these songs. She had sang them to him when he was too angry, too scared, to upset, to any of these things to sleep. She made sure he could rest easy and nightmares wouldn't rear their ugly heads. She had made sure that he knew that there was hope for his nightmares to end and that she loved him.  
  
But he thought these only to be dreams, he never knew them to be real. No he only knew the pain of his father's beatings, the hate he felt for the world and himself, the fear of his father finally getting too violent for him to survive the next hit. These were the truths he knew, these along with the facts that there was more suffering then joy, more pain then pleasure, and that these good things were short lived. This is what he knew the world he lived in, his reality, to be. But his dreams, his dreams had been kind when he was younger; they had left a sweet after taste in his very being and a longing to once again return to the dream land.  
  
But he knew it wasn't healthy to hang on to such false hopes, such nonsense, such silly child's dreams. He knew that to make it in the world he'd have to leave those to only being dreams, he couldn't let them make him soft. He had to be strong and tough to be able and even live in the real world. That was the one thing his father had done right by him, he knew nothing was fun and nothing was games. Life was pain, and you had to just get use to it and do what was told, or risk getting killed. This is what he lived by, until the day he had figured out he could be the one to cause the pain instead of having to take it. He could be on top while the other people coward at his feet. This was the day he had broken free of his father's hold on him, but not fully for he still feared him. But he could hide that fear, it was easy enough. Just be twice as shut up and it was easy to not let anything hurt you. Of course that meant never feeling the good things either but what use were they? All they ever did was get him beaten harder then if he was already suffering.  
  
But still she sang to him, still she loved him, and still he never knew it to be real. Only a dream that may come again, but also it might not. 


	7. Gifts from the Sea

My Name: X-Lynn McTavels  
  
Story Title: Sea Star *Until I figure out a different title*  
  
Rating: PG 13  
  
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Chapter Seven:  
~*Gifts from the Sea*~  
  
He awoke in the middle of the night with that heavenly sent of the sea side lingering in between the realm of dreams and the awaking. He took a deep breath forcing himself to think he was truly smelling it. But it was lost as soon as this was done. He sighed and opened his eyes to low burning embers in the hearth.  
  
"Why is it I never remember that dream?" He asked himself stretching his back, "Ow..." He had fallen asleep in his favorite chair next to the fire in his sitting room. Now there was a large knot in his lower back. He rubbed it nothing fatal. He sighed and picked up his book marking his page with a book mark. He rose out of the chair and set his book on the small three legged table between his chair and the one next to it. Walking over to his bed room he tried to remember the dream, that was the danger of the night, he had spare time, and in his spare time he could think of anything that surfaced out of his deep, cloudy pool of thoughts. How easily the dream slipped through the barriers he set up around it. The barriers must not have been that strong for in his heart wasn't in it, its desire was to know them for what they were. But his head always stopped it at that, only letting it make him want to know what it was. But never could, or would let him.  
  
He sat at the edge of his bed looking longingly out his window, if only he could see the ocean from here. Then Hogwarts would be perfect, it was close enough though. He liked his home here, maybe even loved it. But he never really knew love so he couldn't be sure. But he knew it was the only place he had even felt safe, save when he was swimming at his family's beach. Every summer they went to the beach house. The house and the beach property had been in his family for generations, almost as long as the family its self had been around. He knew if he had ever loved anything that was the closest thing to it. He had had an interest in the ocean since he was a little boy; he had a sea shell collection that seemed to put even the beach to shame. He knew the name of every one, he knew the times of all the tides, most of the animals, all the legends, and so much more it was a wonder his head didn't bust from all the knowledge.  
  
But his father told him he was wasting his life with such things, he more often then not took anything Snape had in his room having to do with the ocean and threw it into the fire. But every time his father took these things away, he started to build up his collection all over again. He soon grew wise to this vicious cycle and started to hide everything, this way only had he kept his precious treasures. He opened one of his dresser draws and took out a small bundle of cloth. It was an old ragged handkerchief and didn't look important, but looks couldn't be trusted. He unwrapped it and let a small black orb roll into his open palm. It was a black pearl that he now held in his hand, he studied it with his equally black eyes. He hadn't found this himself, it had been on his window sill and some one had left it there. He knew this because the night after that he had found several sharks teeth, and after that the shell he had forgotten on the rocks two days before. He had only realized he had done so after his father had finished generously giving him a bloody nose and then sending him to his bedroom. He wasn't sure on why he had forgotten it there but he knew something had happened that had made him forget it there.  
  
But he didn't know what it had been, he barely remembered getting in that night. Besides the red drops of blood smearing his pillow case, when he let his nose go to hold the very ragged handkerchief he was now holding up to it pinch off the flow. He looked at the handkerchief it was so old now, it was stained a reddish-brown from all the blood that had leaked from his nose that night. It was worn from the many times he had pulled it out of and put it back into his pocket. He remembered checking his nose to see if it had been broken, no not this time. Then he went over to his window and peered out at the moon lit waves. He was about to get into bed when a glimmer on his window sill caught his eye. He looked down to find the little pearl sitting there nestled in a small pile of sand to keep it from rolling away. He leaned out of his window to see if any one was there, not a soul.  
  
After a while of staring at it he took up his wand from his desk top and poked at it. One could never be to careful, nothing happened. So throwing caution to the wind he slowly picked it up. It was cold to the touch from having sat so long in the moon light. He looked around once more at any indication that the person that had left it was still there. Still no one, so he gently wrapped it in his handkerchief with the blood drying on it. Then carefully put it into his hiding place for such things, all of this was down with a fogged mind from pain and want of sleep. So he didn't truly know what he was doing, so as soon as he lay down in his bed he had forgotten it was in there. Until the next night when he found the shark teeth. Who was it leaving him these gifts and why? This ran through his mind every time he found another one. He hid them all away quickly so he wouldn't have to part with them. He still didn't know to this day, but he felt it had some thing to do with his dream he couldn't remember.  
  
Snape wrapped the pearl back up and placed it back at the bottom in his draw hidden underneath his socks next to the other little gifts from the sea. 


	8. Out of Order

My Name: X-Lynn McTavels  
  
Story Title: Sea Star Until I figure out a different title  
  
Rating: PG 13  
  
Chapter Eight:  
Out of Order  
  
Snape stared at the dresser for a moment more then went back over to his bed. He was no longer tired, so sleep wouldn't come easy.  
  
"Perhaps a walk will help..." muttering to himself, not truly thinking it would, the man rose from his bed and instantly grabbed his wand from under his pillow. Walking through his sitting room he combed his long, slender fingers through his hair. Sighing he opened his door and stepped out into the hall way, closing his door it blended into the stone wall as if it were never there.  
  
Snape had walked through the halls for some time, merely thinking how he wished to catch Potter and his tag along Wesley out on a midnight stroll. Tanking points off of them was one of his favorite hobbies, right up there with his sea shell collection. Then there was a rustling of night clothes behind him. He smirked speak of the Dark Lord and in he walks. Turning his looming figure around with a sneer to make Mrs. Norris high tail it out of there, he found not Potter but some one he never guessed to find. It was the new red headed girl from his house. She gasped and dropped a water bottle that had been clutched in her hand. It hit the floor and the water gurgled out into a puddle that Flich wouldn't be happy about.  
  
"Miss Nesia what are you doing out this late?" He asked dropping his sneer for a look that was softer and bewildered. She dropped her chin to her chest and shuttered.  
  
"S-s-s-or-or-ry s-si-sir...I-I-I'm l-l-o-s-s-st." She stuttered in a whisper almost too silent to hear. He could tell she was afraid of him, for he got that enough from Neville as well as others to recognize such a thing. But he had never in his teaching career had gotten that reaction out of a student from his own house. She was trembling but unlike with Neville it didn't annoy him and make him want to go on terrorizing the blundering idiot. It made him feel sympathy for the poor thing, made him think of a small animal that had been cornered by a wolf. It made him want to speak softly to her and get her to calm down. But he restrained himself, he just made sure his voice was monotone and at a normal volume.  
  
"Lost? It's been five hours since the feast. Can you honestly tell me you've been lost that long, and even after you were meant to fallow your house prefects to the common room?" She moved her head slightly to the left and then the right in a jester of no. "Well then...." He jumped back feeling cold grip his toes, he felt like yelling at Peeves before he realized that it was the water still spilling out of Amie's dropped bottle. How much water was in that thing? It was now pooled around Amie's feet, his own, and was now creeping down the hall way. "Why is so much water coming out of that?" He asked stepping to a dry spot.  
  
"It's charmed to refill itself..." Was the barely heard replay that was received. No further explanation was given. He frowned he knew what it felt like not being able to remember things he was once so familiar with, but not knowing anything of yourself must be awful. He didn't understand why he was feeling compassion for this freighted thing. He picked up the bottle and charmed the stones under their feet dry. Handing it back to her, she whispered a thank you.  
  
"Why are you out here?" He rephrased the question. She stood there quite for a time,  
  
"I needed to go to the restroom..." Was the answer and nothing more. She was still looking at the ground and shaking even worse now. He felt so sorry for the poor dear, but didn't let it show. He made it look as if he wasn't noticing her fear.  
  
"There is one near your dorm room." He told her. She nodded,  
  
"I tried that one..." She faded off. He now figured she would need to have the information coaxed out of her.  
  
"Why didn't you use it?" She swallowed,  
  
"That little flying man was in there..." Snape frowned, Peeves.  
  
"What was he doing?" He asked with a twinge of annoyance at his being in the girls bathroom, especially in the one of his hose girl's dorm one.  
  
"Smearing rude words on the mirrors...In tooth paste...And make up." She stated as if she were talking to her nose. For he was sure that's the only thing that had really heard her well.  
  
"How long have you been lost?" He asked worried that Flich might have gotten hold of her.  
  
"Three hours..." She answered a little louder now. He felt his brows knit together in pity of such a thing happening to her on her first night in a place she didn't know. Why was it first he felt he knew this girl, and then he wanted to make her feel better. Not to be so scared for Hogwarts was the safest place in the world. But then he thought it must be because she didn't know who she was or where she came from. That story McGonagall told her had touched his cold heart. He hadn't been to sure he really had one until tonight. But he did, for he felt it lurch when he saw those glassier eyes, set in a moon face, under golden fire. He knew her; he felt it in his heart. It may have had an 'Out of order' sign hung on it for some time but now it was in full working service. But only out of sorrow for this girl and the longing to know who she was.  
  
"Has Flich found you?" She shook her head no. He sighed at lest she hadn't been put though his tongue lashing. "Do you want me to show you how to get back to the common room?" She looked up with watery eyes. He felt his heart beat a little harder at that. He jerked his head back,  
  
"Come on then." He said gently as she flinched at his sudden movement. She nodded and fallowed his long strides easily. He hadn't noticed this before but she was about his height, he was a few inches higher then six feet and here was this fifteen year old girl that could look him in the eye. This amused him some but he didn't smile. They reached the common room entrance and stopped,  
  
"Do you know the pass word?" She nodded looking ahead of her. He repeated her nod and turned to leave, he paused hearing her speak the words.  
  
"Mud bloods are filthy...." After the entrance was opened she added. "Or so says the stupid people in this fighting place." He chuckled a little at that. She wasn't totally quite, merely said what was needed. All he had to do was get her to open up and not be so terrified. Wait was he wanting a student to talk more? Merlin he must be losing it. He turned and watched as she was stepping into the common room,  
  
"Oh, Miss Nesia, If Peeves gives you any more trouble, tell the Bloody Baron." He thought to himself, 'That's what I intend to do.' But she only nodded quietly, by the look in her eyes he knew she wouldn't do anything of the sort. As he walked back to his room he thought to himself.  
  
"I guess ghost would be more fighting then living people..." He reached his chambers and spoke his password.  
  
"Star." He didn't know why he had picked that for his pass word, he had done it just after the feast. He usually used a step in a potion recipe, or something along those lines. But no today he felt like star. 


End file.
